You want to know the big secret about grades?
Keep 'em secret.
And here's why: Unless you are absolutely certain you have the worst grades in the group and are wishing to make everyone feel better about themselves at your own expense, no one wants to hear it. Or it may also happen that you talk to someone about your perfect scores because you assumed they were as smart or smarter than you, and then realize they aren't . . . Awkward . . .
So far, you're either so smart everyone hates you and is secretly (or openly) jealous, or you come across as stupid.
But wait, there's a third option. You could find out that you land right about the middle of the crowd. Well, here's the problem with that: people resist change, and this includes yourself. The problem with finding yourself to be in the average crowd is you and the crowd both begin to believe that that is where you belong, and subsequently, where you will stay. And if you don't stay, and your crowd finds out, you'd think they might be happy for you, but that's not always the case.
There's a special secret that any crab fisher knows, and it is this: it is alright if you're bucket is not big enough to hold the crabs, as long as there are two in the bucket, because as soon as one crab tries to escape, the other will pull it back in.
There are crowds that will do that to you when you try to break free, and perhaps even worse is when we do it to ourselves. When we categorize ourself or label ourself according to our ability, we get this absurd notion that our level of intelligence is as much a part of who we are as an arm or a leg and it will never change. When we do this, we are effectively putting a cap on what we might otherwise achieve.
I'll let you in on one more piece of wisdom: no one likes a proud winner, but few people mind a humble one. The thing is, if you really are trying hard, making good comments in class, taking diligent notes, and studying often, people notice, and already, in their minds, their categorizing you in the smart crowd. Either you aren't as smart as they think, in which case, you can just go on saying nothing and they'll think you are very humble, which they will like you for. Or, you ARE as smart as they think, and in saying nothing, they think you are not only smart but humble. Like I said, no one likes the smart and proud, but few people mind the humble genius, and those who do mind, don't matter.
And that is why, it's best not to share your grades. It' alright every now and then to get excited when you did really well. I'm not saying you can't every now and then tell a few good friends.
But for the most part, it's best to keep 'em secret.
Candidly,
Cookie
